


By her side

by The_Names_No_One



Series: Fics for the chaos admins besties [2]
Category: Six - Marlow/Moss, Six The Kids - Fandom
Genre: F/F, Internalized Homophobia, LMAO, Martrude, Mary has trauma, Mertrude, No dialogue btw, Not my best but it’s decent, Reincarnation, Six the kids fanfic, because fuck that is way too complicated for me to add on a fic I wrote in a discord channel, enjoy, g a y, give me some slack I wrote this whole fic on a discord channel timed x, hurt comfort a bit, lol, love my little king, my child who I have wombed, this for Lake
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:08:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29079858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Names_No_One/pseuds/The_Names_No_One
Summary: Mary is always afraid of being alone, but she never has to worry about that with Gertrude by her side.—————————Reincarnation fic for the Six the Kids fandom, it being Martrude (Mary x Gertrude) for my bestie and amazing offspring Lake. If anyone is curious about Martrude, I would suggest checking Lake out on Tumblr (@lakes-other-sixes). It’s not my usual thing to write, but it was fun and I like seeing him happy so I thought I would write this and share it. Besides, now the Martrude server has a fanfic lol.Enjoy~
Relationships: Gertrude Courtenay/Mary I of England
Series: Fics for the chaos admins besties [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2133549
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	By her side

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lakedy Lake Lake](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Lakedy+Lake+Lake).



> In case you missed it, this fic is just a fun little thing I wrote for my friend Lake and was written in a discord channel. So don’t at me if it’s not as good as my other fics that I spend months on please and thanks x
> 
> Copy and pasting this from the summary again in case anyone tried to skip it:  
> Reincarnation fic for the Six the Kids fandom, it being Martrude (Mary x Gertrude) for my bestie and amazing offspring Lake. If anyone is curious about Martrude, I would suggest checking Lake out on Tumblr (@lakes-other-sixes). It’s not my usual thing to write, but it was fun and I like seeing him happy so I thought I would write this and share it. Besides, now the Martrude server has a fanfic lol.

Opening her eyes up, Mary saw a whole new world. One second she was finally embracing the sweet death that she had craved to have taken her out of misery for years, the next she was sitting up in a random house, surrounded by 7 other figures.

The image was so surreal at the moment, darkness suddenly turned to light for Mary. It was as if she was chained inside of a paradoxical abyss as she glanced over each person, rubbing her eyes in disbelief as her mind viciously worked to figure out what was going on.

Each and every single person that laid there in the room all looked like complete and utter strangers, yet Mary recognized each and every single one of them even through the distinctly different features.

Eddie, Lizzie, Fitzroy, Jane Grey, Mezza, Eddie c., and her beloved Gertrude.

Dear God, they were all sitting in the house. They were all just there, sitting right there in front of her. Mary felt a wave of shock passed through her, yet every other emotion she felt was indescribably complex that it boggled her mind to try and explain it. All this time, after everything that had happened, they were reunited and now they were just sitting there. How was she supposed to feel?

Memories began to flash through Mary's head as she grew anxious. Years of pain and trauma, bickering and fighting for survival, betraying and backstabbing each other for their own benefit, and now they were all under one roof together in some different forms. 

She should have woken them up, she knew this, yet all Mary could do was freeze.

So Mary just sat there, panic thrashing inside of her as one by one the gang woke up, each comprehending this inexplicable situation on their own terms. Some handled it quietly, lost in their mind. Others began to cry out of the sheer confusion.

And then there was Gertrude. Mary's eyes had been drawn to her former friend and lady since she first woke up, however it wasn't the secretly admiring stare she once held. No, this one was fearful beyond imagination.

Mary tried to figure out how she'll approach her Gertrude-- she means her lady. Well, guess it's arguable but… No. Gertrude is not Mary's and never will be. However, before Mary could sulk over this fact, Gertrudes eyes shot open, startling Mary.

Gertrude didn't wake up like the others. She started to at first, quietly glancing around, utterly dumbfounded by the situation. However, instead of panic or sadness that all the others held, she wore a smile.

A gracious, wonderful smile that Mary had adored, at least until she realized it was fixated on her.

Oh god, Mary's heart nearly died. After that, Mary kept her eyes to herself until the others finally awakened.

After they all woke up and some awkward first conversations, they all discovered they were reincarnated. Eyes wandered as they all questioned what they should now do, then Elizabeth spoke up and established the goal of finding their moms.

Mary was pleased with this goal, but it brought back this excruciating fear that she had repressed for so long in her past life. If she met up with her mom again, she would have to show Catalina the woman she became, and that woman Mary was ashamed of. 

Mary went against her own religion, going a bit mad from mental illness and even killing people, she wasn't remembered favorably and she didn't know how she could face her mother with that image. History made it seem far worse than the reality for the time, but that didn't change her horrid legacy. More importantly, she didn't know how she would ever confess to her mom her greatest sin that she has kept secret since she was a little girl, hiding her own identity. Mary was a homosexual.

It was against her own religion, her mothers religion, the religion she devoted her past life to, yet no matter what she couldn't help but feel the way she felt. Mary knew she would never change no matter how hard she tried, she just didn't know how she could face her mother as the woman she is now.

At least she wasn't alone anymore, Mary guessed that was a plus. She rekindled with her siblings and cousins, and they all decided the past should stay in the past, that the time was harsh and that at the end of the day they all still loved each other. It won't be perfect, it probably won't even be good for a while, but they planned on making an effort to make it work little by little with each and every day. They were family, and by whatever means that gave them this second chance of life, they would not waste this chance to be a proper family this time.

That was easy. Mary had always managed family drama. What was hard was facing Gertrude. 

Gertrude was reincarnated interestingly, she looked far more younger, early twenties-ish while Mary was about nineteen she would say? It was odd seeing her former role model and first and only real true love be so much closer to her now. Not only that, but what made things ten times worse was that Mary's feelings instantly came back the second she laid eyes on Gertrude, hitting her like a punch to the face.

It only took a quick glance, or a gentle wave, or a soft and friendly smile from Gertrude for Mary to shut down. Her heart felt as if it was restarted each and every time, spellbound by Gertrudes beauty and grace that Mary has admired for years now. A warm feeling spread throughout Mary simply at the thought of her past friend and crush.

God, how was she supposed to face Gertrude or her mom when Gertrude made her feel like that?

It was all just so fucking confusing. So she did what every gay disaster did, avoid the girl and screamed internally.

Things were hard for Mary in her new life. She had all the memories and trauma from the first life, but now she also had the unknown abyss of the new world and new logic that was all so foreign to her. She felt constantly lost and scared, but most of all she felt ashamed of herself.

Mary already knew she was a filthy sinner, she knew she still was from how she looked at Gertrude. But the nickname Bloody Mary popped up one day in an article and Mary couldn’t help but skim the article out of curiosity. Suddenly in just mere seconds Mary's confidence and pride drained away. She was ashamed of her title, ashamed of her history. She hated and feared it, just like how everyone apparently hated and feared her.

It hurts to see the image you left behind in history. Mary knows she shouldn't have cared as there were far many other factors than what historians like to say. But the nickname Bloody Mary stuck onto her mind like glue, constantly mocking her.

She didn't know what to do, she wanted to argue against it, she wanted to fight someone, she wanted to cry on someone's shoulder.

But Mary was alone, so alone. Sure, she had 7 other people who she lived with, but none of them could ever understand her pain, and she wasn't going to burden one of them with her own personal issues that she caused.

Mary had seriously messed up things, so she had to suffer the consequences herself. So she cried, and cried, and cried some more. Mary quietly sobbed in her room at the late hours of the night when no one was awake, all by herself like she knew it should be. The pain and agony shined in her as her own bones trembled.

Mary did this occasionally, at least once or twice a week. She would hold up this mask around her family, smiling as they talked about finding their mothers, and then after a long day when everyone went to bed, she would sit there and cry for hours.

It was supposed to be her secret, something she sneakily did alone. Mary didn't want to be a burden, she would never dare to ask anyone to comfort her.

But then one night, Gertrude walked into her room when Mary was mid sobbing over her past trauma. It took Mary a few seconds to realize the situation, but as soon as she did the color drained from her face.

Mary didn't know what to think or how to react, and in a burst of panic she threw herself onto a pillow and sobbed louder, basically screaming as she prayed for everything to be done. She hated life, why did this have to happen to her, and why did Gertrude of all people have to be the one to see?

Nobody was supposed to know. Nobody was supposed to know. Nobody was supposed to know. But now Gertrude knew, and Mary was fucked.

Mary's anxiety spiked inside of her as her greatest fears became undone before her mind. Thoughts instantly shot up, screaming at her that Gertrude now hated her, that Gertrude would tell everyone and they would all leave her, that she will now be truly alone once again. But this time she would be alone for good. Mary was doomed to be alone, she just knew it, and now Gertrude was going to be the one to make it true.

But Gertrude never made a move to leave. Rather, she hesitated for a second before moving towards Mary and greeting her with a gentle hug. Gertrude then quietly shushed Mary, telling her it was okay and to let everything out as she gently stroked her hair.

She continued to whisper sweet thoughts as she held Mary close, refusing to let go. Right then and there, Mary's whole mind state changed from panicked to calm, feeling secured as she released all of her stress while crying on Gertrudes shoulder. It was painful, it was embarrassing, but at the same time it was warm and beautiful. Mary ended up smiling later that night, and it was all because Gertrude stayed by her side.

Gertrude stayed by her side, just like she always did.

That night awoke something inside of Mary, a new found love and appreciation that strengthened her current crush on Gertrude. It drove Mary insane, but no longer in an agonizing way like it previously had. Sure, Mary still viewed it as a sin and something she could never speak of, but this newfound love made her even happier and appreciative towards herself than she ever had felt before. 

It made things both easier and harder with approaching Gertrude. Nonetheless, Mary was content with her feelings now.

She still had those sad, lurid nights where she cried, but far less now. And now when she did, she just thought of that moment with Gertrude and it got her through the night. Some nights Gertrude would check up on her and they would talk for hours instead of sleeping. They talked about anything and everything: their past lives, hope for their new ones, their fears, their traumas, their joys. They would talk to each other with the utmost sense of love and trust, not daring to stop until they physically passed out right next to the other. Those were the good nights. 

However, sometimes Gertrude would come in and it would be a tearful night for Mary. Those nights were awful, but not in a bad way.

They were pure torture to Mary as they were filled with cuddles and encouraging and loving words from Gertrude, the woman she loved and trusted, the one who was by her side. Each time it happened, Mary fell more and more in love with her, until one night she couldn't contain it anymore.

It was the 8th night it happened, Mary had a memory come back to her, tears in her eyes as people screamed on the stake. It was horrendous, so much so that she began to punch her pillow in raging shame. She felt like a monster, and she knew she deserved these torturous memories for being one.

Then Gertrude came in, so beautiful and considerate, hugging Mary till she calmed down and calling her love, telling Mary she was a good person who deserved to be happy, who deserved to be loved. It was everything Mary needed to hear in that moment, it was what she desperately craved to hear from someone else as Mary no longer trusted herself.

Gertrude then paused for a second, gently stroking Mary’s back as she stared deeply and softly into Mary’s eyes. She then whispered something that caused Mary’s heart to leap out of her throat. Gertrude had told Mary that she respected and loved her more than anyone else she had ever met, past and current life. 

Mary couldn’t believe her ears, they had to be playing a trick on her. After everything they’ve been through together in history, after everything she had done in her past life, Gertrude was still by her side, loving and supporting Mary like the gracious woman she was. It was just too much for Mary. She always feared that Gertrude secretly hated her, but now she was told by Gertrude herself that she couldn’t be farther from the truth.

Friendly or otherwise, Gertrude truly did care about Mary.

Soon Mary realized this, and that's when Mary couldn't hold anything back anymore. So tears in her eyes and with an aching heart, Mary kissed Gertrude for the first time.

Instantly, fireworks exploded as Mary sunk into the soft sensation of Gertrudes entrancing lips. God she had craved this for so long, Mary was reasonating with bliss at the kiss, captivated by the heavenly feeling elicited from the wondrous situation.

However, that was only for a mere second before Mary realized what she was doing: an unforgivable sin that could never be undone.

Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. She just kissed a girl! And not just any girl, Gertrude! Bloody fucking damned Christ!

With overwhelming fear and anxiety, Mary ended the kiss as hastily as she could and fell back onto the bed ashamed of herself and panicked about what she knew was bound to come next.

Oh fucking shit on holy dicks, she fucked up.

Panic, it was abso-fucking-lutely the time to fucking panic.

Oh God, oh God, oh fucking God. She just mother fucking kissed Gertrude, another woman! What was she fucking thinking?!?! It felt so right but she knows it's so wrong!!!!

So why did it feel so right? And why did Mary want to curl up into the side of her bed and just die? Why was this so unorthodox, so taboo? Love of all things.

She didn't know, but it hurt. It hurt so fucking bad and all Mary could do was sit and wait for Gertrude to react. She waited for Gertrude to blow up on her, to call her a filthy sinner, to get up and leave her for good.

But she didn't. Gertrude still stayed by her side that night. Gertrude always stayed by Mary's side.

And when Mary finally comprehended what was happening, she realized that there was no trace of malice or disgust or even disappointment on Gertrudes face. Only shock and-- something that Mary believed her eyes had to be deceiving her on-- love.

They then talked about what had happened, about what caused Mary to do what she did, about their feelings from the past and now, about what they should do now. Mary’s anxiety calmed away as Gertrude reassured Mary that she liked the kiss. Knowing that, Mary was able to find the courage to fulfill what she did next. Mary looked at her and asked if Gertrude loved her, if Mary could kiss her again, if Mary could be hers.

Gertrude simply smiled, kissing Mary again as an answer. It was their second kiss, second of many, many more.

Mary never felt alone after that day. She took pride in herself and her own sexuality, and made it a goal to open herself up to her family and mother. She would be who she was, and she would love the girl she loved.

And that was because of the strength Gertrude brought, the strength that came from knowing Gertrude would always be by her side. Because they loved each other unconditionally, and they would alway be there for each other no matter what. Mary would never forget this, not now, not ever, and most definitely not by Gertrudes side.


End file.
